Casseipeia NEW AND IMPROVED
by Laurie Makensri
Summary: I'M BAAAAAAAAAAAACK!!!!!!!! Look, out King J, cuz Laurie is here again!!! I've redone the first two chapters, I'm working in the rest, I'm on sugar, Y'ALL READY FA THIS?!


This is a story of knights and ladies, kings and queens, pages and squires, Immortals and gods.  
  
In short, it's about Tortall.  
  
Anyway, one day I was walking home from school, muttering about how annoying Jonathan Bothell was. He had spent all of eighth hour calling me an idiot and making fun of the Tamora Pierce books. That day just happened to be the Equinox, as in, the first day of spring. I was bored and didn't have to be at Jess's for an hour so I walked to the park. Why, I don't know. It was just sort of *my* place. A place where anything was possible. That was what I thought when I was sick of this world. I imagined that I'd get swept off into a place where I was liked for who I was. I knew it was impossible, but I still thought about it.  
  
At least, I *thought* it was impossible.  
  
I walked around for a while, looking at the flowers, saying hi to the old lady who was feeding the pidgeons. Eventually I went to my special spot, a little forgotten grove surrounded by pine trees with a bench. No one ever went there, except for me. I sat down on the bench, thinking. I thought a lot. In this case, I was thinking about my dad. He had died when I was ten, and my mom had always been sort of out of it since then. So was I, for that matter.  
  
He had loved astronomy, and taught me everything he knew about it, then got books about it so we could both learn more. I remembered him taking me outside on a December night when it was below zero to watch a meteor shower. He loved experiments, too. Once for my birthday he had given me a Gallileo thermometer kit, meant for people 18 and older, which we had spent three months building. I still had it on my dresser.   
  
I thought for a long, long time. I lost track of how long. I know it sounds weird, but it's totally normal to me. It was something I did. Like some people get mad, and some people cry. I lose it and think.  
  
Anyway, I saw a patch of trees that, well, didn't look right. There's no other way to describe it. *Huh,* I thought. *That's odd. I've never seen that spot before.*  
  
I walked over to the spot and touched it. Not smart. Every thing started moving, and it felt like I was spinning around and around and around. I swear to God that I felt like I had had my head pulled off. I felt detached, like I wasn't part of anything. Then it started hurting. Every muscle in my body hurt like fire was running through it. I tried to scream and I couldn't and it hurt and I wanted my mom and where the hell am I and ow OW *OW* and...  
  
I hit the ground. Hard. I felt something in my arm crack as I landed. "Uggghhh," I muttered as I opened my eyes. For a minute I could have sworn they stayed closed. It was dark. I was in a forest. I realized that in a second or two, when my eyes adjusted Above me I saw a farmiliar *w* of stars, the middle one directly above my head, and then everything went black.  
  
~~~~~~~~  
  
"What is it?"  
  
"Grk," I moaned quietly. Obviously those people--I *assumed* (and hoped) they were people-- didn't notice.   
  
"I dunno, I don't reconize it."  
  
"Maybe it's from the Divine Realms."  
  
"Huh? Owwwwie," I moaned again. It sounded really, really, REALLY loud to me. They still didn't notice. I would have sworn they were deaf.   
  
"And got knocked out? Owen, I don't think so."  
  
"Oh. will you all STOP! That's a person and you know it, Queenscove. And whoever it is, she's hurt."  
  
Nobody took any notice of me whatsoever now. I could have yelled, "BUGABUGABOOOOOOO!" in their ears and they wouldn't have noticed. I started sitting up, then moaned yet again, and collasped back on the ground.   
  
"Kel's right. Quit goggling and get out of the way."  
  
"WOULD ALL OF YOU STOP TALKING ABOUT ME AS IF I'M NOT HERE!" I yelled. Or at least, I *thought* I yelled. Now I think it was more of a croak.   
  
"Wow! It talks!"  
  
"I am SO not an it!" I croak/shrieked as some of them laughed. There were boys all around me, and one girl. Most of them looked about my age, a few older, one or two younger. "And quit laughing and tell me where the freakin' hell I am!" I yelled at the oldest. He looked like he was twenty or so. He stopped laughing immediately. Back home, when I spoke like that, NO ONE argued. It was my one claim to power. The tone had come to be known as the "Makensri Death Blow" by me and my history freak friends.   
  
"I think we should be asking the questions," the one I that had thought I came from the Divine Realms said.  
  
"Listen, buddy, if you want a fight then I'll kick your ass! Oh my GOD my throat hurts!"   
  
One of the boys--who was really, REALLY cute--handed me a water canteen. "Maybe this'll help," he said.   
  
"Thank you SO much!" I croaked as I gulped it. My throat felt better in about ten seconds. "Hey, I can actually talk now!" I turned to the one nasty boy. "Now where were we?"   
  
"Well, at least we know it's regained its vocal skills," one muttered. I ignored him.   
  
"Oh yeah! So you want a fight, huh?"  
  
"Sure. It'll be jolly."   
  
"Owen, whoever you are, quit it!" the girl yelled. "Your arm's probably broken, you're in no condition to fight, and if anyone kicked ass--" she looked puzzled at the words-- "then it'd probably be Owen."  
  
"Whatever," I moaned, sitting down with my head in my hands. "Just tell me where I am."   
  
"Tortall." she answered, like I was an idiot not to know.  
  
"WHAT?!?!?!?" I shrieked. One of the boys covered his ears.   
  
"What do you mean, what?" the oldest, the one that sounded really educated asked.  
  
"You mean to tell me," I said in between deep breaths, "That I'm in Tortall?"  
  
"Why do you find that so hard to believe?" the girl asked. I really have to learn their names, I thought.  
  
"Okay, you guys, what did Jess and Juls pay ya to play this prank? Tell them that it didn't work, that they missed April Fool's Day, and that they should do the world a favor and kill themselves." I said, highly pissed at my two prank-loving friends. *Okay, Makensri, keep mind to current problem. You can make them pay later,* I told myself when I caught myself thinking of different torture devices I could steal from the history museum to use on them.   
  
"Huh?" the nice boy who lent me the water canteen--who just happened to be able to put Michael Haeliey, THE hottest boy at our school, to shame-- asked.  
  
"Either you guys belong on Broadway or you're telling the truth. I'm going for the former." Dad had always called me the two s's and the c--stubborn, set-in-my-ways, and cynical. *Guess you were right, Dad,* I thought.  
  
"What's that mean?" the girl asked.  
  
"You actually expect me to belive that I'm in Tortall, home of Alanna the Lioness, Daine the Wildmage, Numair Samalin, King Jonathan the III, a total jackass for reasons that will later be explained, Queen Thayet, Baron George of Pirate's Swoop, Keladry of Mindelan, Neal of Queenscove, Owen of Jesslaw, Merric of Hollyrose, Faleron of King's Reach, Seaver of Tasride, Prosper of Tameron, Cleon of Kennan, Raoul of Goldenlake, Gareth of Naxen, ect., ect.,? Oh, come on, how gullible d'you think I am?"  
  
"How does she know all our names?" the oldest one asked.  
  
"Okay, this is a total guess on the name, but Neal, honey, NOT NOW!!!! I'm dealing with my mid-teenage-life crisis here! Sweet Lady, Jess and Juls are going to pay for this SO badly! This is so damn embarrassing! Them actually catching *ME* off guard!"  
  
"Well, that would explain why you're so cynical."  
  
"No, it actually doesn't, and, dear, being cynical is one of my charms."   
  
"You obviously don't have many," a big redhead muttered.  
  
"I HEARD THAT!" I shouted. "Just so that you know, I am totally pissed at the entire world right about now, so it might be a good idea not to get me mad!"  
  
"Let's just get you to the palace," the really handsome one said.  
  
"Fine. Can you guys introduce yourselves or something?"   
  
The girl sighed. "This is Nealan of Queenscove--"  
  
"Booyah! I was right!"   
  
She looked at me like I was insane again. "Faleron of King's Reach--" she continued, pointing at the hottie. "I'm Keladry of Mindelan, this is..." She went through the rest of the boys.  
  
"So," Kel said after she finished the introductions. "And you are...?"  
  
"Oh, yeah!" I said. I stuck out my hand for her to shake. "Laurie Makensri, raving lunatic extrodinaire."  
  
".....Oh." she said after a pause. Then, "How do you know our names?"  
  
"Ummm....ummmm..ummm..er..uh...grk...I-no...ummm..I'm psysic?" I said after a minute. Neal raised his eyebrow.   
  
"Damn," I muttered. "I never was good at lying." I took a deep breath. "Get ready for this... In our world, you don't exist. You're a fragment of someone's imagination. There are *books* about you guys."  
  
"All of us?" Prince Roald asked.  
  
"No, just the Lioness, the Wildmage, and Kelly-Girl here."  
  
"Why about them and not us?" Owen complained.   
  
"Cuz' you're not special," I told him bluntly.  
  
"That was meeeeaaaaan!!" he said in a teary voice.  
  
"Whach ya gonna do, run to Mommy, Sir Crybaby?" Owen and I didn't get off to a good start, what with him being so nasty to me and all.   
  
"Hey!"  
  
"WOULD ALL OF YOU STOP IT ALREADY!!!!!" Kel yelled.  
  
"Kel, I didn't know you could scream that loud," Neal commented.  
  
Kel looked at him, took several deep breaths, and then said, in a very quiet, icy voice, "Neal, if you don't help me get Laurie and Owen to the palace, without killing each other, then I'll tell Lord Wyldon and Lady Alanna what I saw you doing with Lady Jeminia in the hall last night."  
  
Neal went pale while a lot of squires laughed, and a few whistled. "How'd you find out about that?"   
  
"That's not the topic at hand. Laurie, do you have any of these....books with you?"  
  
"I would if my bag was here..."   
  
"I would if my backpack were here...."   
  
"Is it this....thing?" Merric said, holding up my Winnie the Pooh bag.  
  
"Yeah! Yippppppeeeeeee!" I yelled happily when I saw my backpack, loaded with sleepover stuff. "Here," I handed Kel Page. "This one's about you."  
  
She took it hesitantly, then turned to page one and started reading. All the boys crowded around her and read over her shoulder.   
  
"Uhhh, Kel, I wouldn't let them do that if I were you."  
  
"Why not?" she asked.  
  
"There might be some stuff you might not want them to see."  
  
"As in?"  
  
"The very end of chapter three."  
  
She turned to the end of chapter three, being careful the boys didn't read over her shoulder, gasped, and shut the book. "Is there a lot of...things....I might not want people to know?"  
  
"Chapter four, near the middle somewhere, chapter five, eighth page..."  
  
"I get the idea!" then she turned to the boys. "NO ONE reads this, got it? NO ONE." She turned back to me. "Can you ride?" she asked, pointing to the horses tied nearby.  
  
"Course I can. Which horse am I on?"  
  
"Better go with Faleron. His horse is the nicest."  
  
"Awwww, Kelly-Girl, can't I go with you?"  
  
Neal coughed, and it sounded a lot like a laugh. "My horse...wouldn't like you.," she said slowly.   
  
"Oh yeah. Sorry. Didn't think bout that." I turned to Faleron. "So, which is yours?" I asked.   
  
He pointed to a beautiful chesnut mare tied to a tree. I went up to the horse and paused in front of her. "Okay, Makensri," I muttered. "Left foot, left side, first." I got up and clumsily mounted the horse. Someone behind me was laughing. "Quit it!" I told them. "It's been like ten years since I've done this!" They stopped laughing.  
  
Faleron got up behind me. "Don't mind Cleon," he told me. "He laughs at everyone."  
  
"Thanks," I said quietly. *You know,* I thought on the ride, *It's not half bad having to ride with this guy....I mean, he's really cute, he's nice, he's not boring....*  
  
After an hour-long ride to the palace, (we had to stop to keep me and from Owen killing each other), Kel and led me to her room, while some of the boys went to talk with Lord Wyldon.  
  
"So," I asked. "Who's you knight-master?"  
  
"Sir Raoul,"  
  
"HAHA!!!! Yes Juls, there's ten bucks for me! We made a bet," I explained.  
  
"Who's Juls?"  
  
"Jessica Markson and Julia Pirytea were my best friends back home. I was going to a sleepover with them when I got zapped here."  
  
"Ah," she commented.  
  
After we got to her room, a woman with dark brown hair came into the room. "My lady, did you have fun on your ride?"  
  
Kel sighed. "Yes, I had fun, Lalasa, and please stop calling me, 'my lady.'"   
  
"Yes, my lady. Who's this?"   
  
I shook her hand. "Laurie Makensri, pleased ta meet cha."  
  
"Laurie, this is my servant, Lalasa Isran," Kel said.   
  
"Cool."  
  
So Kel and Lalasa sat and talked on the bed, and I sat down next to them and looked through my bag. I had my sheepies (my pjs), a t shirt, jeans, underwear, and socks for the next day, my tiny, tiny, tiny, TINY make-up kit (I hated the stuff), and books, CDs, tons of batteries, a deck of cards, the candy we were going to play poker for, and, for some reason, the necklace Grandma had given me before Dad died. *Huh,* I wondered. *How the hell did that get here?*  
  
Then Owen came into the room. He glared at me, then said to Kel, "She's supposed to meet the king now."  
  
"The KING?" Kel and I said at once, Kel anxoius, me excited.  
  
"Yes, the KING."  
  
"Jonathan III?" I asked.  
  
"Yes, him."  
  
"Oh, good," I said, rubbing my hands together and grinning michieviously. "There are a few things I want to say to him...."  
  
  
Author's Note: Okay, people, I'm back in the game! A little explination: I got writer's block, and for inspiration I started reading past chapters. That got me seriously depressed and unhappy, because I KNEW that I could write better than that. So, I planned about two weeks ago to do something I'd been toying with since September. I was gonna give up on Casseipeia. Then, at lunch that day, I mentioned to my friend Em, on whom Juls is based, and she said something similar to, "WHAT?!?! NO, you CAN'T!!!!!!!!!!! NO WAY!!!!!!!!!!" and she sent me all these nice reviews people had written months earilier. She read the snatches of future chapters I'd been working on, and helped me improve on these. She put up with my rants, and helped with my writer's block, and, thanks to her, CASS IS HERE AGAIN!!!!!!!! I'm going to go through and rewrite all the chapters (i.e. edit, throw some stuff, add some stuff, ect.) So, you all have Juls to thank for this being back. If you're glad, email praises to the dear girl here. Or flame her, if your were happy I was gone. ;-) THANKS ALL!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
madameButterfly51@hotmail.com  
  
  
Annoying Disclaimer: I don't own anyone except Laurie, and the plot. I'm not going to put up any more of these because they annoy me. Bye! 


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